Saturday, October 27, 2012

This is what I do with my "mama day", talk/write about my kid. I guess that's what moms do.

My {sometimes} awesome husband decided to give me a well-deserved mama day, after he received a lot of not-so-subtle hints. I just needed a break. He has been working on a few side art projects and so I have been in single mom mode for about a week and a half. Although I did get a night in a hotel this week for work, but a non-working break is in order today.

We are gearing up for Lily's 4th Halloween, which is by far the most exciting Halloween to date. She is excited and we have two costumes, one for tonight's little party at a friend's pre-school, and one for Halloween night trick-or-treating. She understood it last year but this year she can anticipate it and look forward to it, which makes a world of difference. She is also starting to talk about what she wants from Santa, so I am SO excited for Christmas this year.

I had to write a follow-up post about her previously discussed anxiety...it's gone now. She's doing amazing in both gymnastics and soccer. She really enjoys them both now which put this mama's mind at ease. I swore that I completely fucked her up for life, passing my issues onto her, and this was going to be the beginning of a very big battle with anxiety. Then I realized, that is just MY anxiety talking. I'm sure we're going to have some challenges with new environments but now I know that she will overcome her fears, just like we ALL can.

She is genuinely coming out of her shell. She really prefers soccer but I think that's just because she has taken a shine to "Coach Taz", a flamboyant, young, fun man who Lily just finds fascinating. She talks about him at home often and keeps saying we have to invite him over to play.

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Right now I'm living the life that I imagined motherhood to be. I really love this age and want to truly freeze time. I might have said that before but I didn't mean it. Now, I mean it.

Newborn and infant phases are for the birds, in my opinion. And I'm not even going to justify what I'm saying with a "It's a precious time, sure", or "It's a miracle to watch your little one grow, sure" comment. No. I'm sticking with "it sucks" and I really hated not knowing what I was doing during those phases. I knew as soon as Lily hit the 16 month mark that toddler > baby. I could have done without the terrible two's and early three's, but there has to be some bad, right?

Now? It's amazing. She's growing into a personality. A person. A kid. It's entertaining and engaging. There are most certainly challenges that I did not foresee pre-motherhood but this is more of what I envisioned: social calendars filling with kid activities, humorous conversations and banter, the "why" phase (albeit annoying, it can be funny), the "I love you's" and heartfelt comments and questions from an innocent, naive being. This stage is defining motherhood for me. I love it.

And no, I will not be having another, so please stop asking me, complete strangers.


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